Saturday, March 31, 2007

Getting old....

I got the biopsy results back and they are completely normal. Thank goodness. Honestly though, I wasn't worried. I just want to figure out what's going on with my wonky cycles.

Turns out.....................

I am in peri-menopause. WTF!!! Yeah, in other words, I am getting old. Hello!!!! I have two older sisters and THEY aren't slipping into early menopause!!! (Jealousy is an ugly thing!)

They put me on "the pill". HAHAHA! I haven't taken the pill in 12 years!

In fact, I was rather embarrassed picking it up at the pharmacy yesterday. I leaned on the counter and tried to look like a cool horny babe. In reality, just a psycho old chick trying desperately to hold onto her youth.

7 comments:

Antonio said...

Peri-menopause??

Monica said...

"Shoulda been goooone"!!!!!!!!!!!!

Unknown said...

Oh my! :)

I'm sorry your body is putting you through this. Must be all that "healthy" stuff you insited on eating for years! ;) See? Meat...it does a body good! :)

Loved your description of standing in the pharmacy :)

Love you!!

Monica said...

Yeah Michelle, I tried to be all slouchy and emo about it....

Freakin' menopause. WTF!

Oh yeah, it's not full-on menopause...just PERI menopause. (Not Steve Perry menopause, Tony! HAHA!) Just my body building up for it! I can hardly wait for the main event!

Anonymous said...

Damn..... That sucks!!!! Im awake all night... Maybe I am with ya sis!!! Who knows....

I love you anyways....

And hey.... Im bitchy!! :)

Yvette :)

Shoule have hired some pimps to stand along with you!! HA HA HA HA!

Monica said...

Yvette, you could be....insomnia is one of the symptoms! I used to be a champion sleeper! Now I am waking up at the butt-crack of dawn drinking my coffee like a freaking geriatric!

Next thing you know I will be coloring my hair blue and wanting my dinner at 4pm!!!

I tried hiring some pimps but they said:

"Dayam baby, you OLD! You not foolin' nobody!"

Antonio said...

Monica, if you hurry we can catch the early bird dinner special at 4!